Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Gotta Love Em...Well Actually, No I Don't

As the bride, my understanding is that what I pick is what goes. Unless of course the groom doesn't like it, but that isn't the case. It is the future female in-laws. Here are a few conversations that I have had recently.

First let me give these people names. We have LD's sister-in-law. His family refers to her as The Princess and not as a compliment. So that is what I will call her. Then there is his mom. I will call her MIL. There is also his sister. I will call her SIL. Ok, here we go.

Me: "So do you like the dress?"

Princess: "It's what you want."

Me: silence What I am wanted to say. "Don't act to excited" or "Damn straight"


Princess: "So since the dress is tea length what color nylons should we wear?"

Me: "Oh I am not gonna have you wear nylons. I don't like them."

Princess: "I have to wear Nylons with closed toe shoes. My feet would hurt if I didn't."

Me: "Can't you wear nylon footies or get those foot petals to keep your feet from sliding?"

Princess: "No. Those slid around. I have to wear full nylons even with pants if I wear closed toe shoes."

Me: "Oh" What I really wanted to say "Tough shit. It is my wedding and you won't be wearing them."


MIL: "So are we gonna need both banquet rooms for the rehersal dinner?"

Me: "I am not sure. LD did a count of how many people will be there. You figure that the wedding party is 26 and then there dates. Although most of the wedding party is married to another person in the wedding party."

MIL: "Oh my. We are talking 75 people?"

Me: "I don't know."

MIL: "That is going to be alot."

Me: silence What I really wanted to say "Well you are the one who wanted to add more people to the wedding party, so it is your fault it is so many people."


Me: "These are the shoes that I want everyone to wear."

SIL: " Those heels are too high. I will never be able to walk in them."

ME: "I don't think they are that high."

MIL: "SIL will never be able to walk in those."


Me: "I have decided to just let everyone buy their own shoes. As long as they are heels, closed toe and in silver."

MIL: "Are we gonna be able to find them anywhere?"

Me: "Buy them off the internet." What I wanted to say. "I am trying to please you and you can't even be gracious."


Me: "You guys don't have anymore wedding to plan. Unless you wait for Mickey, but he is only 10."

SIL: "She might have to fight over that with Princess and MIckey."

Princess: "And the bride of course."

MIL: "Bride?? Who is that."

Me: "Yeah, who is that?" What I wanted to say was "Exactly!"


Me: "You realize that your sister and Princess are gonna hate me by the time this wedding is over."

LD: "Why?"

Me: "Cause I am gonna make them do everything that they don't want to do."

LD: "No they won't"

Me: "Whatever."


I swear I can't seem to please these ladies and I have given up. After all was done yesterday I had a mini meltdown. LD is very supportive with what is going on. Neither of us want to cause any huge fights, so for now we are keeping our mouths shut. However if it keeps up at this rate I will explode.


Jen said...

There are two events that bring out the "best" in families. Those are weddings and funerals. I HATED planning our wedding, but we decided to do what WE wanted and "screw" anyone else who didn't like it. I swear people try to make things up to start fights. I had my uncle walk me down the first half of the isle and my step dad (dad) walk me the rest of the way and peole were like what does she hate her dad, why is he only walking her 1/2 they way. What they didn't realize (but most of my "close" family did) is that my uncle was from the first half of my life and my dad from my second.

Mikala said...

Yeah, from what I understand you have to worry about what you and LD want - everyone else will fume for a while and then they'll get over it. Don't let it stress you too much.

weatherchazer said...

I hated my wedding- the planning, the pleasing everyone, scraping for cash- everything. I had to have 7- yes 7 bridesmaids because hubby had 7 guys. I say- what the hell?! I should've run far away- from everyone!

tkkerouac said...

Love this red background and the thumbnail, great blog.

Slick said...

All I had to do was show up for my first one....

This second one, Trish wants me to help pick out a dress, do we want a DVD, how about flowers and stuff...


Women may be bullheaded at times but occasions like this always get pulled together.

Or you could just pull their hair?

honkeie2 said...

I am sooooo glad I am a man.
Step One: show up to tux place.
Step Two: Grunt and point.
Step three: have tape measure in strange places.
Step four: come back a few weeks later and pick it up.
But honestly it's your wedding. Make them all look as fat, uncomfortable and oragne as you can. I would pick out the nastiest brides maids gowns I could find so that I would look sooooo much better!

Lisa said...

My future SIL is having probs with my mom and sister too. That just sucks... So sorry to hear that...

Linlee said...

Oh the joys of wedding planning. I made it easy and let the girls pick out shoes etc. as long as they were the black. Since everyone was shaped different I told them they could choose whatever dress they wanted as long as they were the color we picked and from the same store. Amazingly they all picked the same dress. Try not to stress. It's going to all fall into place

Steven Novak said...

MY wife and I eloped.

Many people were annoyed.

We didn't care. ;)


Jaelithe said...

My assvice: Don't worry about the nylons. Really.

The important thing is that you are marrying the man you love. As long as everyone attending can see your love shining through, I am sure it will be a beautiful ceremony.

(And if part of the wedding party winds up looking foolish, well, that will be their fault and not yours!)