I'm Back

I made it back from Vegas in one piece and only a little poorer. Winning $250 helped out a lot. We did a ton of stuff, but one main thing we didn't do was go to a “real” Vegas show. You know the ones where the girls are topless, but have huge head pieces. I really wanted to see one, but we never worked it in.

We did however make it to the Playboy Club one night. I was disappointed. I had heard that it was decorated all neat with bunny head accents everywhere. It was so dark in there that you could hardly see any of it. Oh and also in order to get a table you had to buy a bottle of alcohol. We bought 4 drinks for $45, so you can only imagine how much a bottle cost. I think it is fair to say we didn't stay long.

I did have another playboy first that weekend. I actually bought a Playboy magazine for LD. This was my first time buying and looking at one. I bought it cause there was some female wrestler in it and LD loves his WWE. I noticed that Playboy magazine has a lot in common with Cosmopolitan Magazine. They both have 20 or so pages of ads before you get to the good stuff.

I was interrupted before I was able to get to the nude girls, but I did get a chance to read an advice column. One thing that made me laugh was some guy had written in to ask advice on different ways to cook mushrooms. His wife loved to eat mushrooms, but they were getting tired of eating them the same way. Can we say dork. Why would you write to Playboy for that kind of advice? Why not Better Housekeeping or something like that? Then LD's sister made a good point. Maybe they didn't just eat the mushrooms. Ew gross.

Oh and just to rub my vacation in a little more, I was wearing shorts while my fellow St. Louisians were dealing with snow. I enjoyed a nice warm St. Pat's.

***I am looking forward to our St. Louis Bloggers' Lunch this Saturday. Hope to see everyone there.

Baby Needs a New Pair of Shoes

I am leaving on Thursday for a trip to Vegas. I am excited and nervous all at once. I have never been to Vegas and am looking forward to all the shows, bars, rides and attractions, etc. Yet at the same time I am so nervous to fly. This will be only my second time flying and my first time I got so sick. I am gonna stock up on Dramamine and hopefully will survive it.

Another thing I am nervous about is being away from Munchkin. I have been away from him once before, but that was for 2 days and I was a quick drive away. I know we will both be fine, but I am still gonna have to call him everyday.

A fun part about the timing of Vegas is that alot of people know that I am frustrated with the wedding plans, so they think we are gonna get married down there. I refuse to do this cause I want Munchkin included. However I told my mom that she doesn't have to worry unless my wedding dress is gone. Would it be mean for me to hide it??

I still have alot to do before Thursday. I have laundry to wash, grocery shopping for Munchkin, shopping for Dramamine, packing, learning to take LD's wheelchair apart for the plane ride. Oh and I have to run to the DMV to get a new License.

The one I have now doesn't expire until 2011, but it has bubbles in the film. I am afraid that this will cause me problems at the airport and Vegas casinos. I also wanted to get a new picture on it since 2 weeks ago they almost wouldn't let me in Harrah's because they said I didn't look like the picture. The DMV said they will replace my license for free, but they will be unable to take a new picture until it expires. Here is hoping that I don't have any problems.

Everyone keep your fingers crossed that I come back a bigger winner and not a big broke loser.

Note: If anyone out there is familiar with McAfee Virus protection I would love the help. My dad updated it and the new version won't let me sign into blogger or my email. I have read through the help pages multiple times and can't figure it out. This is the reason I only blog once a week on Tuesday. This is the day I can sneak a computer at work.

My Fine is.......

Join the fun. Just read the "offense" and if you've done it, you owe that fine. No one will know what you are confessing to, so be honest. My fine was $300 out of 1170 (I am such a goody two shoes). What is yours??


smoked pot -- $10
Did acid -- $5
Ever had sex at church -- $25
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you $40
Had sex with someone on MySpace -- $25
Had sex for money -- $100
Ever had sex with the a Puerto Rican -- $20
Vandalized something -- $20
Had sex on your parents' bed -- $10
Beat up someone -- $20
Been jumped -- $10
Crossed dressed -- $10
Given money to stripper -- $25
Been in love with a stripper -- $20
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know -- $10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work -- $15
Ever drive drunk -- $20
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk -- $50
Used toys while having sex -- $30
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before -- $20
Went skinny dipping -- $5
Had sex in a pool -- $20
Kissed someone of the same sex -- $10
Had sex with someone of the same sex -- $20
Cheated on your significant other -- $10
Masturbated -- $10
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend -- $20
Done oral -- $5
Got oral -- $5
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving -- $25
Stole something -- $10
Had sex with someone in jail -- $25
Made a nasty home video -- $15
Had a threesome -- $50
Had sex in the wild -- $20
Been in the same room while someone was having sex -- $25
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars -- $20
Had sex with someone 10 years older -- $20
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 -- $25
Been in love with two people or more at the same time -- $50
Said you love someone but didn't mean it -- $25
Went streaking -- $5
Went streaking in broad daylight -- $15
Been arrested -- $5
Spent time in jail -- $15
Peed in the pool -- $50
Played spin the bottle -- $5
Done something you regret -- $20
Had sex with your best friend -- $20
Had sex with someone you work with at work -- $25
Had anal sex -- $80
Lied to your mate -- $5
Lied to your mate about the sex being good -- $25

Gotta Love Em...Well Actually, No I Don't

As the bride, my understanding is that what I pick is what goes. Unless of course the groom doesn't like it, but that isn't the case. It is the future female in-laws. Here are a few conversations that I have had recently.

First let me give these people names. We have LD's sister-in-law. His family refers to her as The Princess and not as a compliment. So that is what I will call her. Then there is his mom. I will call her MIL. There is also his sister. I will call her SIL. Ok, here we go.
*************

Me: "So do you like the dress?"

Princess: "It's what you want."

Me: silence What I am wanted to say. "Don't act to excited" or "Damn straight"

*************

Princess: "So since the dress is tea length what color nylons should we wear?"

Me: "Oh I am not gonna have you wear nylons. I don't like them."

Princess: "I have to wear Nylons with closed toe shoes. My feet would hurt if I didn't."

Me: "Can't you wear nylon footies or get those foot petals to keep your feet from sliding?"

Princess: "No. Those slid around. I have to wear full nylons even with pants if I wear closed toe shoes."

Me: "Oh" What I really wanted to say "Tough shit. It is my wedding and you won't be wearing them."

*************

MIL: "So are we gonna need both banquet rooms for the rehersal dinner?"

Me: "I am not sure. LD did a count of how many people will be there. You figure that the wedding party is 26 and then there dates. Although most of the wedding party is married to another person in the wedding party."

MIL: "Oh my. We are talking 75 people?"

Me: "I don't know."

MIL: "That is going to be alot."

Me: silence What I really wanted to say "Well you are the one who wanted to add more people to the wedding party, so it is your fault it is so many people."

**************

Me: "These are the shoes that I want everyone to wear."

SIL: " Those heels are too high. I will never be able to walk in them."

ME: "I don't think they are that high."

MIL: "SIL will never be able to walk in those."

**************

Me: "I have decided to just let everyone buy their own shoes. As long as they are heels, closed toe and in silver."

MIL: "Are we gonna be able to find them anywhere?"

Me: "Buy them off the internet." What I wanted to say. "I am trying to please you and you can't even be gracious."

****************

Me: "You guys don't have anymore wedding to plan. Unless you wait for Mickey, but he is only 10."

SIL: "She might have to fight over that with Princess and MIckey."

Princess: "And the bride of course."

MIL: "Bride?? Who is that."

Me: "Yeah, who is that?" What I wanted to say was "Exactly!"

**********

Me: "You realize that your sister and Princess are gonna hate me by the time this wedding is over."

LD: "Why?"

Me: "Cause I am gonna make them do everything that they don't want to do."

LD: "No they won't"

Me: "Whatever."

************

I swear I can't seem to please these ladies and I have given up. After all was done yesterday I had a mini meltdown. LD is very supportive with what is going on. Neither of us want to cause any huge fights, so for now we are keeping our mouths shut. However if it keeps up at this rate I will explode.

What to Give Up

Today marks the beginning of Lent. I have been thinking of what I can give up. Some years I stick to it and others I fail miserably.

One year I gave up sex. I did awesome that year. Of course I was single and I never had any propositions for one night stands, which I probably would have declined anyway. Although someone did point out that I should have given up my own "self indulgence" instead. That is just plain crazy. I would have failed miserably.

I have given up soda and chocolate before. Soda was easy, but I didn't last with the chocolate. I could give up one of these, but I want something challenging and I don't drink alot of soda. Oh and I gave up chocolate earlier this year for another reason. I will have to write a post on that to get everyone up to date. So I finally came up with giving up fried food. This should be a challenge since I love me some french fries.

There is a second motive to giving up the fried food. Weight loss before big Wedding in October. Gotta look my best. What will you be giving up or if you aren't giving up anything, what should you give up?

Love This Movie

My new favorite toy is my iPod that LD got me for christmas. I have loaded tons of my cds on it and a few of Munchkins. Yesterday I was looking at what songs I could buy and a movie that I saw years ago popped in my head. It then dawned on my that there had to be a soundtrack to it. There was and of course I bought it.

What movie you ask. Why it is "Best Little Whorehouse". This movie stars Burt Reynolds and Dolly Parton and has Dolly singing the famous song "I Will Always Love You". Here are a few clips for those who don't know what movie I am talking about and also for those who do. Enjoy.

Dolly Singing at the Chicken Ranch


Football players singing about going to the Chicken Ranch


Dolly and Burt (This one has a few minutes of talking and then singing.)

Upgrade

I finally upgraded my blogger. Hope ya like the changes. I kinda like the colors, but that is likely to change. I am a woman and tend to change my mind often.

I don't really have the time or patients right now to put all my daily reads on, so don't think that I forgot any of you that are used to seeing yourselves on my sidebar. I will get you on there later this week.